Friday, June 3, 2011

[struggling]

I am struggling with my diet today. *Grumble*
I wrote a blog entry last night about my diet.... and after having a restless night of tossing and turning and worrying about anything and everything, I am struggling today to stay optimitistc and to stay motivated.

For five days I have eaten exactly what I am supposed to eat at the exact times i am supposed to eat... and I have spent all of the time on the treadmill that I promised myself I would. I woke up to weigh myself, only to be dissapointed AGAIN at what the scale said. I have not lost ONE pound in 5 days of vigorous dieting and exercise. *sigh*

I did, however, put on a pair of capri's that I purchased in Derby 10 days ago and they fit slightly more loosely than they did 10 days ago. I guess that is a good indicator that I have maybe lost some mass. I need to buy a sewing tape measure so I can log my measurements and keep track of them as well.

The point of putting myself through all of this is to be come more healthy (of course) and to LOSE WEIGHT. I am carrying around WAY too much weight and I am ready for it to be gone!! I know that losing over 100lbs is a HUGE venture and I anticipate that if I stay on track it will take well over a year to accomplish, but I also thought that I'd maybe lose 1 or 2 lbs the first week. -grumble again-

I have an appointment with a Physician on the 13th. He is going to check my thyroid and I am going to undergo a phyiscal to make sure that everything else is in propper working order. I am also going to speak with him about diet and exercise and see if he has any insight as to what might work best for me at this point in my life.

I have had several friends that have had gastric bypass surgery over the years. Many have been successful, yet a few have not been as successful. I'd be lying if I said that having gastric bypass surgery hasn't crossed my mind. I am fearful of undergoing an elective surgery, however, and I know how difficult the recovery for a surgery like that is. GBS is something I am contemplating, however, if months and months of diet and excersie do not do the trick for me.

I am tired of lacking the energy and stamina to keep up with my kids. I am tired of my knees and feet hurting when I walk at the grocery store. I am tired of looking in the mirror and being disgusted with what I see. I have gained well over 65 lbs since Frank and I got married... and he has lost around 80lbs. I feel we are at two very different places in our lives and I want to develop the same lifestyle and make the same healthy choices that Frank has made.

Any way, I feel better having taken the time to write this. It has given me that extra little bit of motivation to keep going and to keep working at it. Nothing worth having comes easy :) Just gotta put one foot in front of the other (literally) and stay positive.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

[my diet.]

I am on a diet.... and I figured Id share :)
(This diet is called "Six Week Body Makeover... and the program cost me roughly $200.00 to buy.)


Due to my particular body type (which is "Endomorph" and was determined by me filling out a questionnaire) I have a specific diet program to follow in regards to extreme fat burning.

I eat 5 (or 6) meals every day... usually 2.5/3 hours apart.

Proteins I can eat: Chicken Breast, Turkey Breast, Lean Ground Turkey, Delicate Fish (Haddock, Flounder, and Cod), Fish Steak (Tuna, Mahi Mahi, and Shark), and Egg Whites. Carbs I can eat: Rice, Potato, Yam, Oatmeal, Barley, and Millet. Fruits I can eat: Strawberry, Blueberry, Blackberry, Grapefruit, and Pineapple. I can eat any veggie (except for Squash, because it's also a carb.) Lettuce, Sprouts, Cucumber, and Mushrooms are FREE veggies. I can east as much as I want at any time I want :)

I do not use any oil, fat, sugar, or salt in my cooking. I splurge and use Wishbone Salad Spritzers to dress salad every now and then, but only 10 sprays (= 10 calories.) I use only Mrs. Dash Salt-Free seasoning to season food. I also use several different vinegars to add a bit of flavor to fish or to greens.

I make fresh Pico to top fish, potatoes, and salads. I also make turkey chili (no beans) and tomato sauce using canned no-salt diced tomato.

I blend up cucumber, dill, mustard seed, and a splash of rice vinegar to make a dressing for fish and salad. I also have several other oil and salt free marinades I have learned how to make for chicken and fish.


Breakfast:
2 oz. protein
1/2 cup carb
(Rapid Results: 2 oz. turkey breast and 1/2 grapefruit.)

Mid Morning Snack:
2 oz. protein
1/2 cup fruit
(Rapid Results: 3 oz. tuna steak and 1 cup greens.)

Lunch:
2 oz protein
1/2 cup carb
1 cup veggie
(Rapid Results: 2 oz. fish, 1/2 cup yam, 1 cup greens.)

Mid Afternoon Snack:
2 oz. protein
1/2 cup fruit
(Rapid Results: 3 oz. tuna and 1 cup greens.)

Dinner:
2 oz. protein
1/2 cup carb
1 cup veggie
(Rapid Results: 3 oz. fish and 1 cup veggie.)

PM snack: (optional)
2 oz. protein
1/2 cup fruit
(Rapid Results: 2 oz. chicken breast and 1 cup greens.)



I also spend an hour on the treadmill every day... staying in my target heart rate zone (which is 126 - 128 bpm.) This zone is ideal for burning fat.

I started this diet on Sunday the 29th. My goal is to lose roughly 3 or 4 lbs every week. If I lose more, that's GREAT :) I am having a slow start unfortunately. In the last 5 days I have not lost any weight, which is unfortunate. I am sure, however, that maybe I am losing inches or toning up some muscle i havent used in a while. I keep telling myself that even though I dont SEE the results, they are there all the same.

I am excited and ready to take on this weight loss adventure. I am hoping that by my 10 year class reunion in September I look (and feel) a bit better than I do now. *Fingers Crossed!*

[what to do.]

There is a new development in our little world... one that i am not quite ready to share with EVERYONE yet so it will go right here in my blog instead of all over Facebook.


Frank has the potential to land a spot as an Engineer in Training ("Fireman in Training" or "FIT") down in Longview, Texas. Longview is roughly 60 miles west of Shreveport, Louisiana.... up in the eastern corner of Texas.


As has become the standard this last year, we are yet again faced with a HUGE decision.


Naturally, both Frank and I agree that if we had nothing else to consider other than the opportunity itself, he should NOT pass this up. It's the golden ring. Being an Engineer is what every Railroader longs to be. The fact that he could become an Engineer during his first year with Union Pacific if HUGE. It also promises at least $15,000 more a year in pay and quite a bit of notoriety. (I have to mention that just because he finishes training as an Engineer, that does not ensure him an Engineering job... but it does give him a marketable skill and the potential to work as an Engineer. I will talk about that in a bit.)


Having said that, we have so many other things to consider, which makes this decision much more difficult to make. One thing we have learned during Franks employment with Union Pacific is that things can change in the blink of an eye. You can get bumped from one job to the next without warning, and right when you think that things make sense and that you have it figured out, the railroad will jerk the rug right out from under your feet.


The training itself takes roughly 6 months... and it starts on July 11th. If we choose to move the family down to Longview while Frank trains to be an Engineer, we have to consider there is a chance that once he is done training his sseniority as an Engineer in Longview might not be enough to ensure him an Engineering job out of Longview.


The railroad bases everything on Seniority. Franks Conductor seniority and Engineer seniority would be two separate things. Since Frank was hired on as a Conductor back in November of 2010, he has a bit of Seniority because other Conductors have been hired since then, and even out of his class he was the top of his class. If he is hired on as an Engineer on July 11th (which is when the training would start) he would have very little Engineer seniority.... and will have only accumulated a small bit by the time training is over and he needs to mark up on a job.


If he CANT hold an Engineering job out of Longview or Shreveport because he doesnt hold the Seniority needed, unfortunately there are no Conductor jobs that Frank could hold in either town as well. That means that Frank would have to work in Dallas/Fort Worth because that is where he has the best chance of holding a job because it is a bigger hub and most of the guys Frank holds Conductor Seniority over work there. He could bump one of them out and take their job. Keep in mind, Fort Worth is roughly 2 hours away from Longview.


We would be renting a house most likely, and usually they require a years lease. We get locked into a years lease, and there is a good chance that for 6 months Frank would be living and working seperate from us. I am not in love with that idea. I am also not in love with the idea of convincing myself that frank wont be able to hold an Engineering job out of Longview or Shreveport, thus convincing myself that he should pass on this AWESOME opportunity.


Both Longview and Shreveport (as of right now) have several Engineering positions available according to several folks Frank has spoken to. Could Frank hold one once he is done training? There is no way for us to know. He could hold one for a week or two and then someone with more Seniority than him could swoop in and bump him out of it! -shaking my head!-


My head is about to explode. He has to make a decision in the next 3 days as to whether or not he is going to bid and possibly snag this opportunity. It's a lot to figure out.


*SIGH*


The question is, do we risk it? I am leaning toward "GO BIG OR GO HOME!"